July 14, 2015

9 Things a PMSing Infertile Woman Shouldn't Do

Otherwise known as things I did last week.  It was some good times I tell you.  So I thought I'd share in case anyone would like to learn from my mistakes.

1. Work a nearly 60 hour work week.

Yes, there are things to be done at work, and yes, when your first start a job you probably want to impress your boss.  However, when PMSing, taking it a little bit easy on yourself helps deal with what's to come.  Being beyond stressed out and past your energy reserves is not.  Pro-tip: Go home on time and take a nap instead.

2. Volunteer to Help Plan a Baby Shower

Ok, this happened before last week, but I had to include it.  I don't care where you are in your cycle, as an infertile woman, getting involved with baby showers is dangerous business.  I'm not saying you should never consider going to a baby shower (though that's totally ok if its what you need to do). I'm just saying maybe you shouldn't dive in and volunteer to help with every single baby shower that comes your way, like a certain masochistic author of this blog does. It will not help things, and I don't think it's healthy to be trying to figure out how to plan a baby shower with as little mention of the baby as possible...

3. Take Multiple Pregnancy Tests

One might be necessary, especially if you're taking meds that would need to be continued in case of a pregnancy.  However, I suggest taking said test as late as possible, and then accepting the negative and letting it be.  What is not helpful is taking the first test jussst early enough that mayyybe there's room to doubt, wracking your brain about it all week, then taking another one and being shocked and crushed at the still negative result.  Not that I repeat that cycle every month or anything...

4. Go Shopping for Presents and Decorations for a Baby Shower

Just stop while you're ahead, get a gift card or something.  And no, shopping online won't be better.  It will be worse because there will be pictures of all the babies you don't have, leaving you sobbing to your husband about not wanting to go to the baby shower but having to because you volunteered to help in the first place (see how the vicious cycle works?).

5. Attend a Double Baby Shower

Once you're already hitting an emotional wall, you probably shouldn't keep pushing yourself just to see how far you can take it.  I mean, a regular old baby shower is enough, let alone one with double the bumps and what not.   Ok, that's my last entry about baby showers, I promise.

6. Listen to All the Sad Songs on the Radio

You're already emotionally unstable, why would you make it worse with moody music? And by moody music I mean anything that's not obnoxiously peppy.  Anything less than that will be translated to saddest. thing. ever. by brain on hormones.

7. Forget to Take Your Happy Pills

If you some sort of supplement/ prescription that keeps the hormones at bay/ keeps you even keeled, you should probably be extra sure to take it during this volatile time of the month.  You probably shouldn't skip them just because you want that extra glass of wine.  It might not be worth the repercussions the next day.

8. Leave the House Without Pain Meds

While we're talking about important pills to remember, these are definitely at the top of the list.  If you can make it without pain pills, more power to you.  But if the cramping is already starting, even if its not *that* bad yet, don't leave the house for 6 hours without pain meds. That is exactly when you will get the worst cramping you've ever had, with absolutely nothing you can do about it.

9. Decide to Clean the House After an Exhausting Weekend

Let's see, if you've had a long week, and an even longer weekend, with the last few hours of it you should probably get some rest.  What you probably should not do is complain to your husband about the house being dirty, which makes him start cleaning, which makes you feel like you have to clean, and then keep cleaning until past your bed time.  You may end up throwing a tantrum and start crying while throwing all your clothes off a shelf because its a mess.  (Your husband might respond that it is, in fact, now a mess).

So yes, a fun week and even more fun weekend. When I start doing things wrong I just really don't know how to stop. There are a few things I'd like to think I did do right though:

1. Drink Wine

Ok, maybe that extra glass of wine was worth it, wine is always worth it...

2. Meet Up With Supportive Friends

It will definitely be worthwhile, and might even make you feel better.

3. Have a Patient Husband

This one, probably the smartest thing I've ever done.  Lucky for me, the Hubs seems to think its cute when I'm being ridiculous and hormonal (I'm pretty sure it's anything but that).  And will help me pick up and hang all the clothes that somehow found its way to the floor.  He's a keeper I tell ya.

I'd love to hear any other don'ts or shining moments that you have to share!


  1. Oh my goodness just reading your list made me exhausted and tense!! God bless you for being involved in a baby shower - truly an act of love!! And I'm so glad you had wine/friends/husband to get you through :)

    1. Haha sorry to make you exhausted and tense too! Yes, wine/friends/husband are a winning combination :)

  2. I laughed out load at this and TOTALLY relate!! Here's my Dos and don'ts starting with the don'ts:
    1. Don't review all the sad moments of your life.
    2. Don't watch The Duggars.
    3. Don't call your sister who is pregnant and listen to her talk about how hard it is now that she can't work out intensely (especially when your doctor has told you to only do light exercise) and think of how at least your sister has a baby at the end while all you have is your out of shape body!
    4. Don't watch Raising Arizona. (Despite being hilarious it'll make you sad and make you seriously consider stealing a baby from someone who's got "more 'n they can handle". )
    5. Don't talk to that friend/family member who always asks you if you're pregnant yet.

    1. Do pray with gratitude and not with complaining. Thank God for all the many blessings in your life one by one.
    2. Do have hope for the future despite how bleak the present may appear.
    3. Do fun things with friends who won't bring up the dreaded topic.
    4. Shop.
    5. Eat yummy food and drink good wine. I no longer do any of these fertility diets. They haven't worked for me and just make things harder for me.
    6. Yes, totally agree that #1 Do is have an awesome husband which thank God, I do!!

    1. Haha I love your list! Especially loving the dos, that first one is so necessary but so tough.

  3. Love the list! All of it is so true! I especially love your list of Dos, the meeting up with supportive friends is a must ;)

    1. Haha glad you liked the list! And yep, those supportive friends are awesome :). So glad we got to meet up!

  4. Yes! All the way through! Also, stay way from the freaking pregnancy due date calendar when you're in limbo. It never helps. Never.

    1. Oh my gosh yes, I'll have to add that to my list of things not to do!

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  5. I love that you take a really tough week and attempt to spin some "funny" out of it, while at the same time being so REAL and bringing more awareness to this struggle. Thanks for sharing!

    1. Thank you for your kind words and for stopping by!

  6. All the above sound like a recipe for disaster! So glad you have a supportive husband that will help you pick up the debris of your really bad day without even giving you a hard time about it. (Okay, maybe a little bit, but that's what husbands are for!)